Tuesday, January 11, 2011

...that loves a sinner like me.

The song lyrics in my most recent post have been haunting me for the past two days as I've been trying my rotten best to hear from God. I've been complaining, thinking, "C'mon, God...what's the deal? Why won't you speak to me?"
And then it dawned on me: maybe God is speaking to me and what He's been saying just isn't what I wanted to hear! So I thought back on the past few days and the things that have been going through my head and I realized that amidst all the everyday thoughts, little words such as: "Surrender" and "Submit" have sneaked into the few empty spaces in my mind. And then, after reading the additional notes to the reading from my 21-day plan:


"During this fast, you'll have many opportunities to deviate from your commitment--especially if you're fasting alone or if no one will find out. Pray that God will give you the resolve and courage to stick to the standards you've set and honor Him no matter what."

I told myself: "okay, Kristi...you can totally do this. Twenty-one days. It'll go by before you know it!"
However, as soon as those words sunk into my mind, I felt like slapping myself in the face for believing them. How could I be so selfish as to want to limit the amount of time I spend sacrificing my earthly desires for the sake of honoring the Lord?
Thus, this is my resolve: every time I recognize something that is taking up my time and tainting my attitude, I will give it up for a three-week time period.
The point of this 21-day fast & reading plan is to bring me closer to God, but why save it for only 3 weeks at the beginning of the year? I want to be brought closer to God not only after these next few weeks, but every day for the rest of my life.

2 comments:

  1. Kristi, I LOVE this! This is such an admirable thing to do and I know that God will bless you and your spiritual life by doing this for Him. Keep it up, I love you!

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  2. Thanks Susy, that means a lot:) I love you too girl!

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